“That’s how I always wanted to spell my name!” I exclaimed with glee.
“Really?” She beamed. “I’ve never met anyone who spells their name like this.”
“Exactly,” I smiled back. Five minutes in to the appointment and not a joke uttered.
When my doctor arrived on the scene my nerves must have receded. Maybe it was the book I read while sitting in the waiting room (Natures Secret Messages: Hidden in Plain Sight) or maybe it was just the end of the day and we were all exhausted. Regardless, not a joke was left in me and I remained calm, almost human.
“I know, weird, right?” I nodded as someone finally validated my struggle. I officially liked this new doctor.
He then said the most amazing words to me. “I’m taking thyroid cancer off your record.”
“Really?” I cocked my head to the side and leaned forward.
“We don’t know what it is yet. First, you need to have surgery and we need to get the path results back. There is only a 50% chance this is malignant.”
“Oh…” I hesitated. 50/50 odds. Sounds… well, half good?
“Those are high numbers.” He continued making my nerves calm down even more, I might have been numb actually.
And then we made a plan.
There are two paths to take, one involves removing the thyroid getting all good news and everything is in the clear. The other involves everything above but with not-so-good-news and a little radioactive therapy.
If all goes well we can start trying to have a family immediately (within reason) after the surgery. If Plan B goes into action we have to wait a year, which honestly breaks my heart.
I am 39. That’s a stat that I can’t change. I cannot diet or carb load to move that number up or down the scale. It is truth.
But, I am hopeful.
Hey, the odds are 50/50.
And I have faith.
Because even though it doesn’t always feel like it, that’s a big number.
And I have a great team in place.
I choose to move through this with love and faith and hope.
In fact, the surgery in Portland has been officially renamed. It is now dubbed: Party In Portland.
Care to join us? We will be painting at the Rogue Distillery Aug 21st the night before. Grab your seat and drink and come on down!