Archive | 10:39 PM

JAMIE’S BLOG – DAY 58 :: exposing what’s broken

27 Feb
I made it to and through two yoga classes. Small feat. Two HOT yoga classes in one week. It’s not easy for me, mind you, these muscles are being stretched beyond their limits. I have yet to chataranga and I have never seen my legs shake so violently through yoga pants before, to the point of convulsion.

It’s tough to be this out of shape. It’s hard to look at my shaking thighs and try to remember what they used to look like, what they used to feel like, what they used to be able to do.

So tonight when the instructor said, “Pay attention to what hurts. It has to be exposed before you can fix it,” I had to take a pause.

It’s so true. I can’t fix what’s broken if I don’t know it has broke, or is tired, or out of shape, or shaking so hard the room thought there was a west coast earthquake hitting the gym floor.

Sometimes it feels so not very fair. Having spent so much time taking care of my head, heart, body and soul, getting in great shape only to have three surgeries bring me down. Sometimes it feels like looking up at a mountain, one where I almost made it to the top and then tumbled my way down to the bottom.

And then other times, someone says something that makes me take pause and feel again that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Listening to my body.

“Pay attention to what hurts. It has to be exposed before you can fix it.”

More tomorrow.
Lovemore,
Jamie

  {what are you paying attention to?}
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